Mirror Mirror On the wall

Have you ever looked in the mirror and it felt like the first time ever? Where you completely recognized you and was fully at peace with how you look? I have recently experienced this. I was standing in the bathroom washing my hands and looked up like I do everytime. Except this time was different. I stood there for a minute looking at me and thinking, "Where have you been? I missed you. Welcome Back!" It was honestly like I had never looked into the mirror before that moment...

I may not be in the look where people thought I was the hottest, Or most put together. But none of that mattered in this moment, and quite honestly still doesn't. I realize now (though have known it a long time) I have found myself, almost completely. This feeling is beyond calming and beautiful. I am who I am, and I love me.

I approve of not needing approval

Hey everyone, How are you? Today I am feeling amazing. Yesterday and the day before didn’t feel so amazing.  Though needed.  As you’ve read typically my days are filled with crazy happenings, a lot of laughing and just all around a good time.  Mostly because I still allow things to me new and exciting in my life. But for the past couple of days, even though not bad, weren’t the most amazing of all my days. We had decided to pack up camp and come back into town a while. The weather was turning cold and we were both beginning to feel disconnected from the world. We came back into Idaho falls from Kelly Canyon. Beautiful camping there and amazing hikes. The sky at night was breath taking and peace a solitude was refreshing.

Though camp was more than one could ask for in camping, after a while you feel like you need to be reacquainted with people.  My ego for a few days had been in complete swing. I had allowed myself unbalance and for my ego to take over my thought process. All of these things consumed my mind. Like, but not limited to: “What the hell am I doing? I have made myself on the verge of homeless and now someone has joined my escapades.”, “ I am wasting my life”, “You moron, you have things going so well, and every time you give them up to have new experience.”….Honestly the list of things keeps going,. I end starting to blame myself for a bunch of things going on, I beat myself up over screwing my life up and begin blaming myself for screwing other peoples lives up. Which all of these things I see as not true.  I am not responsible for others lives, and my life I have actually set so I can do this and have experiences that I’ve only, until now, dreamed of.  I know these things, but my ego had the best of me and to be honest as I am typing this out, still has a bit of a hold.

The past few weeks I have had a lot of things happen to me, as you can read. Mentally there has been a bunch going on, that I am as well trying to sort through and process. However, I have not been processing as well as I should. I realize this, for my head feels full! It like pressure right before you get a headache, but it’s different enough that I can tell the difference between the two pressures. So now, I am working on processing all the events physical and mental ones. Though I have had some awesome things happen to me in the physical world, admittedly, I have had a bit of turmoil in my mind recently.

Kerli- Tea Party

The Wonderer in Wonderland

I swear I have the most amazing things happen to me! I can’t even begin to explain some of the cool stuff that happens. Like the UFO shiz,  random free concerts, my newly founded Autistic Abilities, and now My own personal wander land! WHAT THE HELL FUCK SHIT YO! Or for the Mormons, WHAT THE OUTTER DARKNESS FUCK SHIT YO!

Here’s how the Shit goes down. Step one Shank Alice, Step Two Jump In the rabbit hole. ( for once I wasn’t being a perv!) Ok, so didn’t go quite like that. Like well, there was no Alice, and Not Rabbit hole. BUT, There was a Wonder land in Idaho.  It was Amazing, I swear to Jahova it was like walking through a painting. The artist being, a blend of Bob Ross, Thomas Kinkaid, and god! 

Here’s the real story of how this awesome shit went down! We decided a couple hours before sun set that we were going to go hiking and try to find a path to get to a tower on the top of the hill from where were camping so we could watch sunset. We get to this split in the road we had came to last time. One split we had take took us up a really steep slope what was so much a path as a run off ditch. The other seemed like a really mellow trail. What made us decided the other path first is beyond me now that we found this path.  We obviously to take the path that was more relaxed looking, everything looked normal until we go to this tree that had fallen over, but was overhanging the path.  As you pass under this you come to a bend in the road. From this point it turned out gorgeous, the colors and the vibrancy of all the flowers. The layers of trees and the mountains behind them. The ever flowing meadows of wild flowers and the sweet grass with blue an read patterns stretching out in these meadows. Even the hum of the bees in the flowers was perfection on this hike. At one point I had picked up a rock and tossed it into the wild flowers, watching it land about 3-4 feet away beside a stump, this was about an hour from camp. On our way back to camp the rock layed on the path just a few yards from our camp.(Explain that one!) We came across a tiny off path, that lead into this amazing painting we were wandering through.  As you stepped passed the branches slightly over hanging the path, you  were engulfed in the painting itself. And small winding path that led to the mouth of a tiny natural spring. Littered with Beautiful stones, glimmering in the little bit a sunlight that peaked through the many layers of leaves. The occasional chirp of the passing bird. The sounds of the dirt bikes and four-wheelers had all but vanished. A light breeze, and the soft pinks and blues in the sky from the setting sun. Now if there was a  small cottage with windows illuminated by a soft glow of candle light and covered in moss this scene would be something right out of Kinkaid’s mind and Ross’s paintbrush. I could have lived in this Wonderland forever. 

Just remember when you’re setting in your 9-5 there are other worlds to explore out there. There are a million things to see that, as humans, we forget exists. Just because its more important to have a huge fucking house filled with expensive and yet cheaply made crap. 

Have a great day!

From Wonderland with Love!

Buzz Buzz Imma Bee! I will pump my bee juice in you!

As most of you know at this point I have been in Idaho falls, well, near Idaho falls. We’ve been camping in Kelly Canyon near Idaho falls area. My friend Janet and I have been here for nearly a week at this point camping out in this I have to say pretty kick ass spot. Perfect view for sun rise and just over the hill perfect for sun set. Can’t ask for anything better! Not only that access is rather easy, but still very quiet. Plus the area was already clear. So can’t go wrong here! There is however one flaw, there’s not toilet seat! Sigh

We have got the tent area set up just right and fire pit already constructed (with a few tweeks) and we ourselves built a little shelter out of pine branches to chill under when it is really hot out! Another words for a crazy guy like me, well I could live here. Well I would prefer a little cabin and I would be good to go!

Since we have been here we have been hiking  a couple of times. One of those times we were walking over a pile of old dry wood. (great idea eh?)
This is where the unthinkable happened! Que serious background music! We disturbed a bee’s nest! OMG AAHHHH! The plus side was they had settled for the night, it was in the midst of twilight and as anyone with a brain of some sort knows bees like to sleep early, for they like to be up at the ass crack of dawn to annoy the piss out of anyone who can hear them. Yes, that my friends is the real and ONLY reason they want to get up that early, so they have all waking hours to try and piss something off! Okay, Back on topic. Luckily for us they weren’t already swarming, for like I said they were asleep. I am behind Janet on this hike and Happen hear a very loud buzzing look over and OH SHIT! I yell RUN. She doesn’t think twice, takes off, as do I. I get away scott free. She got away for MAJOR woundage! Two whole bee stings! Okay, okay. Not major, But not pleasant. Getting stung isn’t like sex here, it hurts. They are creating a hole ( not using one that’s already there) to put their mean bee juice in you!



Then a couple days later we came across the fact that there is an underground bees nest right near camp that we have moved pasted and around many times. But now we are all nervous and quite haven’t decided how to remove these demonic creatures! Well, demonic is a strong word. But  creatures that don’t like us to bug them… haha, bug. Get it! Funny they don’t like us to bug them because I have came to a revelation about them. We are just like them. People I mean. (just thought I would specify)

Look at the similarities, Like them we work and work and work. And for what? To hand it to the “rulers”. We work like drones and think nothing else of life besides work and that’s all. Then if something bothers our own little colony and ATTACK , get pissed off, ATTACK SOME More, then rebuild and go back to working.  So the statement rat race is officially changed to Bee race and I still wont play along!


Love
Wonderer

Yellow Stone Part 2 UFO

I cannot say I feel like things are always as they seem, Sometimes I feel like we are all being tricked in this plane of existence that things are just how we see them, or is it where the planes of existence converge and were not ready to see those things. Well most people aren’t ready to accept them as they are for real. Maybe it is like were all living out lives and then people throw in a random play or skit that we just don’t realize isn’t really real, but only a mirage to hide the truth from us. To fool us into believing things are just as they are, and that’s all, nothing more, nothing deeper with more meaning and more life than we allow ourselves to see.

This is how I felt many times as we drove through and visited multiple places in this Nation park of Yellow Stone. All of its beauty and peacefulness. The wildlife and the tourist who aren’t the wiser to my feeling of wandering through a beautifully laid out set sectioned off from reality to show a beautiful side of our reality. To show us how peaceful and safe we all are.. Interesting the place chosen of this is a highly volcanic area that is overdue. Maybe that’s why is felt false. A false sense of safety with in one of the most dangerous areas in the world. Maybe my feeling of there was more there than appears before out eyes. Who knows which.

How ever interesting situation that happened as we were leaving. I was in the back in a meditative state, off in my own little world. Having a great time. And BAM breaks, we come to a complete stop in the road. I come to, to hear a conversation of the star in the sunset. A very bright star right in the line a the sunset. Luckily we have binoculars with us. I grab them take a look, and come to the conclusion that it (even though the tail of it is in a v and not a straight line) that it is nothing more than a jet. So my friend Maya grabs the binoculars from me and looks, She watches this jet split into three objects, hands the binoculars back to me for me to look. Sure as shit its three different objects all flying together. HOLY BALLS YO! We all Gander at this object for a while. People stop to ask us what were staring at. We say a strange object in the sky. They, without a thought, just move on. We continue to look to try and figure it out. At this point it have gotten large enough in the sky to attempt a picture. Also notice the flight pattern is no a straight line. Our final conclusion is, well, UFO. Unidentified Flying Object. That’s one creative answer! So here’s the photo, its not very clear because we had to zoom in all the way. Take what you will from it.

Yellow Stone National Forest

 Isn’t amazing how things go?  So I get to Idaho falls and I get to experience things I had wanted to experience on this trip. Like I got to go to Yellow Stone, which I will admit I was disappointed when I reworked me trip to basically miss it, because the track I was taking made more sense… herm. Anyways, point being I know this pretty kick ass guy who wanted to go and got to! That would be Me. Your amazingness you can call me J… I was so excited and I am pretty sure I showed it, basically like a little kid, haha. But you know what, I am okay with that. Just because I am.

So we get here to this little town called west yellow stone, and I wandering around, all excited and at this point trying to hide it. I knew when we get here there were things I wanted to see. Old faithful was NOT one of them. Sorry Old faithful. There are other gysers who go off more often and to be quite honest as far as I am concerned are better, well to be honest with you Faithy, they don’t have as many people surrounding them waiting for you non faithful behavior to spew all over. I like anticipation building,  but with all the people its like a creepy orgy. Not a big enough climax to please me either. I am sure you please many people you dirty whore, just not me.

Yes we skipped over her ( the over viewed hooker) and saw the good stuff. Many bubbly mud pots, and spewers, really hot water and places where I am not dumb enough. Like the picture with the boy scout burning to death it shows and his I am assuming his sister staring in astonishment, She much have been praying for his survival. I got to see a lot of Bison and I think an elk or just an over sized deer. The falls and many other things. The falls were beautiful. These huge Water falls surrounded my yellow rock cliffs, We went on all sides of those… There was an interesting thing going on at yellow stone though. They claim there was a bear attack in the area and had all these areas closed off all around the falls. It felt off to me, Like that wasn’t the case. It didn’t help that it wasn’t even in the area of the bear attack or where they had spotted the bear that was closed. Something felt off to me about it, I cannot describe it but it felt staged to me.


We went to the Lake in the park and was there for a long time. There is a land bridge that reach’s out into the lake. We walked down this where the sand was of obsideon and quartz. I may or may not have collected some of this sand.   The energy was cool at this lake though, It had the feeling of being a very old lake. Like there were things in there that no body knows exist yet. The cliff was crumbling on the side we parked. Guess what  I had the most fun exploring. This lake all I can say is it was peaceful, it felt old, and it had secrets it did not want to share. Many of them.

There are more things to share about this trip to Yellow Stone, However this is long enough….So ….To be continued.

The Wonderer's Life Paradox question

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Things are interesting you know? Life is a paradox, and the humor behind such is something of the gods. When you feel like things are perfect, we change them to something not so perfect. When we are happy, we find away to destroy it for ourselves. These my dear friends are obvious statements of truth and firmly amusing. The thing I ask why of is why the hell do we want this misery? Not even so much misery as simply an experience we have been taught that they are such? Maybe We have been taught to do things this way...You have to suffer to enjoy... Why?

Religion, Idaho Falls

In Idaho falls, Idaho there are certain things you find. First thing, a man made water fall. Beautiful water fall it is.  The next thing you will find In the small potato town is not potatoes! But you will find Plenty of Mormons. This here is where I learned about Joseph Smith, A second time. Funny enough it was a different story. One that made more sense to me, and didn’t feel like details were missing. Mr. Joseph Smith’s ,the founder of this Fine religion ( that reminds me a lot of southern Baptist), story goes like this.. In my words. Hi I am Joe, I live in New York. I am a free mason. They don’t like us. I decide to make my own religion. I call Moromism. We have many wives (because I am Horny), women or worthless and cent get to the other stages of heaven. I am horny. The end.